From Background Extra to Lead Role: Take Charge of Your Life’s Script

Let’s cut straight to the chase....

You’re living your life, tick, but if we’re being honest, do you ever feel like you’re just in the background, playing some side character while the real action is happening somewhere else?

Maybe you’re feeling a bit stuck, swamped by responsibilities, or like life’s happening to you rather than for you.

I get it. It’s easy to feel overwhelmed when the to-do list never ends, and somehow, you’re always putting yourself last. But here’s the truth: you’ve got more control than you think!

You’re not just a background extra in this story—you’re meant to be the damn star!!!

The Great Role Confusion

Picture this: You’re drowning in emails, your coffee’s gone cold (again), and life’s just thrown you yet another deadline.

It’s like everyone else wrote the script, and you’re just showing up, trying not to drop the ball. Before you fake a sudden existential crisis just to escape… take a step back.

Ask yourself: Are you calling the shots, or are you letting someone else direct this movie?

Signs You’re Playing an Extra in Your Own Life:

1. You’re living by everyone else’s expectations.
2. You’re constantly waiting for the “right time” to live the way you want.
3. Your biggest life goal is just to keep the peace and not rock the boat.
4. You say “That’s just how it is” more than you say your own name.

Sound familiar?

Here’s the thing: this isn’t about shaming you. We’ve all been there. But if you’re still reading, that means you’re ready to flip the script.

It’s time to fire that crappy director and take control. (If you haven’t worked it out yet… the director, is YOU!)

The Lead Role Revolution

Here’s the twist you’ve been waiting for: You’re not stuck.

You’re not trapped in a role you didn’t choose.

You’re the lead character in this story, even if right now it feels like the script is writing itself.

“In every good story, the hero wants something, the villain gets in their way, and the hero must prove they have what it takes.” - Donald Miller

You’re the hero. Your self-doubt? That’s the villain. But guess what? The hero always has what it takes to win—if they choose to. And now, it’s your time to step up.

Claiming Your Spotlight: The No-BS Guide

Rewrite Your Script: Toss out the “I can’t” storyline. Start saying, “I’m working it out.”

Fire Your Stunt Double: Stop letting others make decisions for you. It’s your life; take the lead.

Improvise: Life doesn’t come with cue cards. Make choices based on what you want, not what you think others expect.

Demand a Better Wardrobe: Stop blending in and start dressing (metaphorically or not) like the star you are.

Ad-lib Your Lines: Speak your truth. Stop apologizing for just existing. Seriously.

Owning Your Story

Here’s the thing: being the lead isn’t always glamorous – I’m afraid to say… Sometimes it’s hard. Sometimes it’s scary. And sometimes it means falling flat on your face. But that’s the thing about leads—they get back up, dust themselves off, and go again.

Even the best actors didn’t nail it on the first take. Your life is no different. You’re allowed to make mistakes. You’re allowed to feel uncertain. But you also have the power to decide where the story goes from here.

“The secret of getting ahead is getting started.” - Mark Twain

Twain was right. You can’t direct a movie that’s never been filmed. So don’t wait for the perfect conditions. Don’t wait for life to hand you the perfect script. Start where you are, with what you’ve got. The rest will follow.

Your Action Sequence (Because Reading Without Action Is Just Fancy Napping)

1. Identify one area where you’re living like an extra—whether that’s in your career, your relationships, or your personal growth.
2. Make one decision today that your lead role self would make. Feel the fear and do it anyway.
3. Start a “Director’s Cut” journal. Write down how you want this story to play out—scene by scene.

The Final Scene

Here’s the reality: the cameras are rolling, and the stage is yours. You can keep blending into the background, or you can step up, claim your spotlight, and start living like the star you are.

Whatever you’re feeling right now—fear, excitement, a little bit of both—that’s okay. You don’t have to have all the answers right this second. But you do have to take the first step. And I’m here to remind you that you’ve got this. You’re not alone in this journey. You’ve got a whole cast of support (including me) rooting for you.

Now, go out there and give the performance of a lifetime.

Lights, camera, action!

With love & a metaphorical kick in the ass,

Sam x

P.S. If you’re still sitting there reading instead of taking action, remember: the credits are already rolling. Time to shout “Cut!” and reshoot this scene. You’ve got too much potential to be wasting it in the background.